8/11/00

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August, 2000

8/11/00

A moment of silence for Colleen. Alas, she was the "last of (her) kind" -- the final Pagongian to receive the official "boot" from what remains of the dreaded Tagi Alliance™. Poor little thing, her legs horribly etched with flesh-digging parasites, yet her sense of sarcasm till intact. As she was voted out, admonishing in an urgent whisper to the others (their heads held low in shame for their ill-deed), "Be nice to each other -- play fair." So very Colleen. She may look like a fifteen-year-old, but she is wise beyond her twenty-three years. She often articulated openly about the Tagi Alliance™ collshot.jpg (3814 bytes) , and she never kissed ass (knowing, of course, that it would be a demeaning and ultimately fruitless tactic -- since she was bound to be voted out eventually whether or not she "played the game"). Last week it was Gervase (damn, I'm still pissed about that) -- and, of course, he too knew his days were numbered.

So, what do we have left? Five scheming Tagians ready to pounce on one another and munch on their competitors' bones (for who knows when the next pizza delivery cometh).

Richard: Ugh. I should have known that a "corporate trainer" would be so perpetually smug (it's probably written in his DNA -- that's how he was drawn into his profession). As if having to endure glimpses of his flabby, nekkid body weren't bad enough, we were treated to his little "victory" boogie after the last Immunity Challenge™. And, of course, he's sitting on the beach next to sour-puss Rudy watching Colleen and Kelly as they try to keep their balance in Wednesday's Immunity Challenge™. And, of course, Rich is joking that Kelly will be next if she doesn't win immunity ("Little does she know, she's leaving the island tonight. Ha, ha!"). Yeah, well, Rich-O -- you might be amongst the last two, but remember that the remaining Pagongians shall sit in final judgment of you. They have learned much from you about alliances. They will have no trouble convincing the last three Tagians to vote with them against you. Such irony.

Rudy: Let me just say that there are a few things about Rudy that I just don't f**king like. For example: 1) His constant use of the word "queer" when referring to gay people. I could cut him some slack because he's 72 -- but shit, my mom's 74 and would never use That Word. 2) Also -- there is absolutely NO excuse for calling African-Americans "colored people" anymore. Gee, why not just throw in "negro" and ... I'm sorry, but I can't even type the "N" word. 3) Railing against people who are single parents and parents who are not married ("In my day, girls who got pregnant were sent away. Or dey had an abortion...which I don't agree wit' by the way.") And naturally this was a direct slam against Gervase after receiving news of the birth of his son, Gunnar Peterson. It's a wonder Rudy didn't say, "Yeah, dats how dem people are -- dey just have one after da other and don't get married." ('Course, he might actually have said something like that and Burnett and company edited it out.) Other than that...well...I guess he's okay...

Kelly: Isn't this nice. A woman who was once in possession of stolen credit cards AND with an arrest warrant is now one of the final five. Well, she won't be going home with the million -- the Alliance™ is gonna get her first.

Sean: Cute. I'll give him that much. This guy's a neurosurgeon? Yikes. 'Course, perhaps what he lacks in common sense, he more than makes up for in surgical acumen. I sure hope so. Don't want him going anywhere near my brain, thankyouverymuch. I like when Soo-ZIN remarked, after meeting Sean's dad in Wednesday's episode, "Jeez, he's just as clueless as his son -- he didn't know nothing 'bout sports or world news."

Susan: What was the cameraman thinking when he stuck his camera between Soo-ZIN's legs whilst she was eating her rice? Thank Ghod she was wearing shorts (and, hopefully, underwear). Anyway. Soo-ZIN ain't gonna make to the Final Two™ -- she might make it to the Final Three™, but this is where she will choke. Her back-stabbing, double-dealing ways will have only gotten her to the final challenge competition.

Here's how I think it's gonna play: Kelly goes next (unless she has immunity); Sean goes next (unless he has immunity). This will leave Richard, Rudy and Susan. Susan will lose the final challenge. The Tribal Council™ (made up of Greg, Jenna, Gervase, Colleen, Kelly, Sean and Susan) will vote for....<drum roll>... Rudy! (Ghod, I want sooooo badly to see Richard's face the moment the decision has been announced. Oh. So. Sweet.)

Word play. Is it just me, or does the term "compassionate conservative" sound like an oxymoron? Just wondering.

Ant swarms. I swear, when I'm lying in bed at night, the ants must think I'm a dead grasshopper which they intend to dismantle and carry off to their anthill under the house. In the middle of the night, I reached for a tissue to blow my nose and ended up with a face full of ants. I smelled their sickly/spicy odor and felt them swirling all over my face. Ack! I've given myself several small bruises from slapping the little buggers off my arms and legs. We must find stronger "ant bait." I want them to go away. Now.